The Prince of Darkness is taking advantage of “puny mortal” mishaps when it comes to spelling errors with technology, announcing the new game Words With Fiends today.
Le Shallot was there for the scoop.
“It’s really time our IT department started taking advantage of the public relations opportunities provided to us in abundance by stupid or tired people on the internet,” Satan remarked in the opening lines of his press conference that was held at Microsoft’s Bing headquarters to unleash yet another hellish abomination upon the internet community.
“It works like this: our program piggybacks search engine software to detect people entering typos, spelling errors, or other errant search queries and then sends those to our live team of eager demons and ghouls. Here, the unfortunate person who entered the search to begin with gets assigned to one of our staff persons, who is in turn assigned to hauntings and negotiations with the foolish mortal, the ultimate goal being to purchase their soul for all of eternity through some easily fulfilled contract. We’re basically just using what works for us already and now adding a new, easier way to find potential clients via the Internet. I’m very optimistic,” he explained, clearly brightening at the prospect of feasting upon an uptick in the human souls currently streaming into Hell.
Only time will tell if Words With Fiends is ultimately successful for those currently revamping this and other programs in the Perdition infrastructure, but Le Shallot is betting that there are enough poor spellers out there to keep the Devil Himself occupied until the end of dys.